“Thank God, you have a job. You would be able to deal with living apart from him”, they said.
True. It’s been ten months that he has been posted out and because of the nature of my work, I am trying to deal with the obvious facts and fears. Does that help always? No. Never!
You put on a brave face, smile often when you do not want to. You do not want him to worry about you and your parents to get worked up on living in a city all alone with no friends or family. I do cry myself to sleep many days, may get defensive and think Bhaad mein Jaa (Go to Hell)! Sometimes, I feel like telling him to leave everything and get back to me. I get irritable and needy. I feel exhausted and yes, it sucks big time. But I persevere. I keep waiting for the day he’ll come for a leave or the day we’ll meet and I try to keep my head over water till that day. I count down till the day we meet and keep it together meanwhile.
What do I miss the most?
a. The sound of his bike
b. Spooning at night
c. Nudging each other to open the door early morning for his Sahayak.
d. Unburdening the office gossips
e. Him calling out my name.. “Shalu…”
Hmmm…
What I thought would help me in coping up:
a. Sleep till noon- To an extend it did! But how long will you sleep?
b. Watch back to back T.V. series
c. Online shopping
d. Eating Maggi day and night- Now that he is not there, for whom should you cook?
e. Not to think of him and the so-called separation
What almost kept me sane these days:
a. Write it out on your blog, in a diary, or send him love letters (which I never did. Oh why I wonder now. I was the most romantic sort. Pata nahin hua kya hai mujhe!)
b. Work!!! Oh, yes!
c. Get a hair cut or hair highlights! I did that and burnt my pocket! Could have got a return ticket to Thailand with that sort of money.
d. Learn something new- quilling, knitting etc. (Really???)
e. Have a ball of a time with your girl friends. (Who wants to party without him!!)
As Aditi Mathur rightly said, There is strong. There is Army strong. And then there is Army Wife Strong. So yes, I have put on a brave face to smile and march on. Hats off to those Army wives who manage to take care of their kids, schools, dogs and all that alone! At least I need to now take care only of myself.
So yes, we are Bold, Brave, Daring and Defiant!
I am Married to the Olive Green and I’m writing about the 26 things which I get to do/experience that you as a Civilian wife do not!
I hope you come back again tomorrow!
Meanwhile, here is an easy Chicken recipe from my Food Blog to try out!
I’m on co-host Pam’s Unconventional Alliance Team along with Parul from Happiness and Food, Rajlakshmi from The Twinkle Eyed Traveler andDestiny’s Child and Claire from A Field Trip Life
Computare Citus: Computer software instructions says
I loved this post. Well written and honest!! Great job, again.
Are you going to post your expensive hair cut/highlighting?
#AtoZChallenge
@liannekruger from Computare Citus
Shalzzz says
Thanks much, Lianne. 😀
Lata Sunil says
Ohh.. the eating Maggi thing. That was saddest.
Shalzzz says
🙁 Came out of it with the AtoZChallenge and now cooking and eating those delicious chicken recipes!
Lata Sunil says
Thats good thing you are doing. I love all your recipes .. they are simple and easy to cook.
Vinay Leo R. says
* waves hand at Tomato Girl *
Hellooo. Not just job, but phone calls with friends too. 🙂
Light-hearted banter apart, it’s still not too late for the love letters. 😀 Send him one. He’ll love it.
Be Army wife strong and push ahead. If anyone can, it’s you. If you feel like talking, vilicho. 🙂
Shalzzz says
Aww…. Thanks, V!!! 😀 And about the love letters- Hmmph! naaaaaa…… cheesy abhi! 😛
Vinay Leo R. says
Who bothers about that? 🙂 it’s an expression of love. and the Tomato loves Mr. Tomato a lot. 😀
Me Otherwise says
Sigh!! I am just through with one of these phases of separation… but for a few months only and then again back to 4-6 months of separation
Bikramjit says
Maggie of all the things that can’t be healthy .. can it. .
Take care and soon he will be back .. and all this sadness will go away..
Roma Gupta Sinha says
Candid post swthrt <3…I wish you get to hear Shalu….from him really soon 😀
I am sure u must be countind days 🙂
StraightFromTheHeart (@RomaGuptaSinha) says
Candid Post Shaluuuu….How much I wish you get to hear it from him soon 🙂 <3
Must be counting days….
kalaravi16 says
Hey Shalzz, sweetheart you are so brave! I am sure being strong as you are is what keeps your man in green confident about being apart from you….so stay strong dear! It is really good you have working, blogging and friends to help you cope, but I guess the nights are the hardest! Letter love…start writing them, for now he’ll be thrilled and both of you can enjoy reading them together years later! Love and Hugs
@KalaRavi16 from
Relax-N-Rave
My Era says
{Hugs}
I know it must be difficult to be miles away on your own, thinking about your man, missing him and worrying about him all the time.
But you are so right that you are not just strong but army wise strong and you are doing well 🙂
I like the idea of writing love letters. Go pour your heart out and send them to him. Who knows may be you’ll feel heaps better doing it 🙂
Roshan R (@pythoroshan) says
I can only imagine how hard it sucks to be in that position, loving someone and not being able to have them by your side.
Respect for you and all the army wives…
My entry for the #AtoZChallenge –
Star Trek: The Next Generation
sagarpillai says
Nce post shalu 🙂
richajindal says
The pain of separation & executing the duties is more. My uncle & aunt stayed away for a long time, understand the pain.
@2richajindal
http://richajindal.com/good-life/
CM says
Yes Girl.. you put your brave face on and be army wife strong and soon the separation would end..:) in the meantime .. stop eating maggi and enough with the highlights 🙂
fabulus1710 says
Eating Maggi day and night! 😀 You better cook some of the wonderful dishes you post on your blog, and keep yourself healthy and fit for when mister comes back!
Quilling is a nice hobby. I’m planning to take it up again after the challenge gets over. Let’s see, I might post a few pics at my blog too 🙂
Cafenined Words says
meet him soon ??
You so miss him that’s the beauty of love life .
Hen you said I eat Maggie day and high because for whom I will cook …all are attached to love .
Enjoyed reading.
Yes, it irritates to be alone, I was alone many time so can relate :’)
So finding ‘me’ time and books gonna help you …
Love : *
Shilpa Garg says
Aah! It takes a lot of strength to stay away from your spouse. While you try to keep yourslef busy but loneliness does creep in. Maggi… it has been my dinner for months too!
vishalbheeroo says
Think army people are made of steel that is passed to their wives. Guess, happens with people who has been living together but patriotic call makes it tough. I believe that there are no better patriots than army wives and children.
Rajlakshmi says
Long distance is never easy but you are a brave girl… and you have the brightest of smile… so keep smiling girl
A Whimsical Medley
Twinkle Eyed Traveller
Parul Thakur says
VT was away for 4 months and that were hard. I can’t even imagine and I know it’s hard. Aditi is right – you women are awesome and your men, even more. Hugs!
StyleBurp says
There is a saying love blossoms from the distant relationships…so army people are more brave and romantic.
@bloggerabhi1 from
StyleBurp
Shalzzz says
Thanks for the mention, Mam. It really means a lot coming from you. Much Love <3