Unforeseen, unpredictable situations are not a new thing for us, Army Wives. Glad to give you an anecdote.
I would like to take you to that day when we had our pre-wedding shoot. Butterflies in my stomach, accelerated breathing, a racing heart and flushed cheeks! Just his smile made me swoon. I was meeting him after eight months of our engagement- our second meeting! As I told you before- perks of an arranged marriage!
So, there I was, plucking flowers and walking and running around, following the instructions of the photographer to get that perfect picture. Then he announced it was time for couple photographs. I shied away from meeting his eyes. I didn’t have any command over my feelings and emotions and I was blushing as red as a tomato! It was then that he said,
“Err..hmm.. I wanted to tell you something. I might have to leave for J&K…. mmm.. well, mm… seven days after our wedding!”
The song from Border, “Toh Chalun” was ringing on my head. No kidding!
This was just the beginning!
a. Just as in the song, your soldier might have to leave you the very next day after your wedding night! Or like mine, after a week. You are sad and heart-broken. What does that teach you apart from being brave and put on a smiling face in front of all? Learn to travel alone! Simple. You will have to run around with your luggages to his posted location, to your work place, to your home, to his home and every other possible place.
b. Lucky are the ones who could spend the first two years of their marriage with their soldier without having to bother about the call for duty. But then, there are landlines to annoy the hell out of you. Learn to accept the Yes Sir, Roger Sir phone calls, in both his landline and mobile phones. No! Curb that urge to smash the phones into a million pieces when he gets a call every single minute of the day and night.
c. Oh the unexpected announcement that he would be out for temporary duty for 4-5 days. Learn to live alone and manage things.
d. The saga of unexpected announcement continues. This time it’s a party that you’ll have to attend to. Told ya, my darling soldier has this uncanny ability of announcing just 30 mins before the time and yeah, by then I will have to decide on what saree to wear and then yes, W.E.A.R. On other occasions, it would be about a dinner that he had called a “few” friends over. The “few” would include the officers and their families. Be prepared to cook a fairly good meal, set up your home, and be presentable- all in an hour or two.
e. Learn to speak Hindi and its different variants. Hindi is the Army Language. Hailing from the south, I simply couldn’t converse in Hindi, though I can understand well. Blame it on my fascination towards Bollywood movies and songs. It is especially important so as to talk to your maid and the Sahayak Bhaiya.
I know of an incident where the lady didn’t know how to talk in Hindi. The officer had informed her that he had called a few friends over for lunch and imagine the horror of the new bride. All she could think of was seek help from the Sahayak Bhaiyya. She wanted to ask him to buy a chicken for her to cook. But poor her, she didn’t know how to say chicken in hindi. She tried different methods to convince him. Sign language didn’t seem to work. Finally, a lightbulb flashed above her head like in the cartoons. She showed him an egg and said, “Iski Mummy ko leke aao”.
No, not my story. But yes, I have had such close encounters.
f. You get to see some beautiful places where a civilian can never dream of entering. But then snakes, snails and leeches become your constant guests at home. No, not all places of posting are bad. You can also spot deers grazing on your garden, the dancing peacocks and cheerful parrots. Learn to live with it, literally!
I can think of a hundred more. And I didn’t want to touch on our biggest fear!
I am Married to the Olive Green and I’m writing about the 26 things which I get to do/experience that you as a Civilian wife do not!
I hope you come back again tomorrow!
Meanwhile, here is an easy Chicken recipe from my Food Blog to try out!
I’m on co-host Pam’s Unconventional Alliance Team along with Parul from Happiness and Food, Rajlakshmi from The Twinkle Eyed Traveler andDestiny’s Child and Claire from A Field Trip Life
There are perk sof an arranged marriage. I loved your description of pre wedding shoot
Hmm. So in a way, the memsaab has to also be brave in a lot of situations, alle? 🙂
PS: Love the title of your post. 😛
Does that biggest fear in the park starts with E & ends with T?
” Iski mummy ko leke aao” that was really smart 😀
This post brought out the tough side of bring an army wife, though in a subtle way, but it only added to my admiration of all army wives ( that I harbour since childhood).
You ladies rock ❤️
My Era from @theerailivedin
The Era I Lived In
Thanks for the early morning laugh! Your chicken and egg story reminded me of a recent problem I had with my maid from Jharkhand : I forgot the Hindi word for crawling and told her to watch out for the baby ( my grandchild) who would soon be walking on ‘ chaar pair’ .
Btw one Hindi speaking Army wife once complained to my mom ( we were staying in accommodation that didn’t have walls upto the ceiling ) that when she and her husband had a fight everyone knew what it was all about because everyone understood Hindi – so my family was lucky that we could shout at one another in Marathi and no one would know what we fought about.
Loved it 🙂
An army wife have to learn a lot of things to keep the heads up.
That was fun : p iski mummy ko le aao ???
Overall enjoyed reading especially the click ❤ that deer and greenaey ??
@dixita011 from
Cafenined words
They say in the US that a soldier is property of Uncle Sam. I suppose that applies to every army in every nation. You do your best in each situation and perhaps learn to cook some things and freeze them that will reheat well for those impromptu dinners.
Ha ha! That mummy le aao was funny. So many heads up and I wonder how you army wives get used to it. I’m sure it must be hard in the beginning. Isn’t it? Enjoyed reading your post Shalini!
Hats off to you and all army wives Shalzz! One never thinks of all the continuous changes one has to put up with in such a way of life, always being alert and sacrificing time with your loved ones. Iski maa ko leke aaoo….tooo good!
@KalaRavi16 from
Relax-N-Rave
hahahaha mummy ko leke aao. That’s hilarious and witty too 😀 I love reading your anecdotes… you know that already 🙂
Definitely in army you get to visit and see places that civilians might not.. I remember when visiting my uncle in port Blair. . What a beautiful place it was.. and people on mainland india did not even know about it..
And I hope the mummy of the egg got cooked ok… He he he hw
Haha. Well written and witty. I enjoy your posts. Always. No doubt.?
I love the way you have described your life as an Army wife. Each post of yours is witty but meaningful. Keep writing 🙂
The chicken egg incident was too hilarious 😛
Do they really have pre-wedding photo shoots? I’d run away screaming like a deer in headlights 😀 *hides face*
Eight posts down, eighteen more to go. Good going! And congratulations on the Brett Lee meet 😉
Cute post Shalz all the way thru 🙂 Lucky you have sahayak bhayyas 😉 My dad was in the army when I was little n they were called Batman or something then 😉
http://www.sunilavigauthor.blogspot.com.au/2016/04/hiranyakashipu-letter-h-for-a-to-z.html
The chicken incident had me laughing out loud. But on a serious note it’s hard to put up with unexpected agendas.
Hi Shalini. I came to have a look at your fab blog…via a mutual blogbuddy…Dixita. Most fascinating and informative…..Thanks for all the info, humour and fun. 🙂
Wow, that was interesting. Certainly a different life to mine! ~Liz http://www.lizbrownleepoet.com
It is great that u are a good cook 🙂 Or did u learn on on the job. Mummy ok lana was funny.
so many challenges…I can’t even imagine how it must feel if the husband had to leave immediately after his wedding. but it’s also amazing how you have learnt to look at the humourous side of life blending it seamlessly with the difficult ones.
Shubhangi @ The Little Princess
Daam good post ! .Arrange marriage do come with set of contradictions .
Happy Weekend Shalzz.
I am following your posts as the instruction booklet 🙂
Lovely post Shalzz….specially the part of egg ki mummy. Also, it wud’ve been more interesting if we wud’ve got a glimpse of pre- wedding shoot….u mentioned…may be in any of the next posts…Keep writing!! 🙂
@bloggerabhi1 from
StyleBurp
Aah! You guys have it tough! I am still laughing at “Iski Mummy ko leke aao”. LOL 😀
Oh God! You are brave!
“Iski mummy leke aao!!” that’s hilarious! I’m still laughing at it! 🙂
Toh chalun? How cute 🙂
Perks of an arranged marriage! Lol! So true!